The Exciting Game of Career Girls #2: Lori
Then: adventurer/stewardess/architect. Now: alternative educator
Name: Lori
Grade school era: 1970s
What did you want to be when you grew up? Why? I thought I’d be some type of adventurer; I fantasized about living on an island or knowing survival skills. I toyed with the idea of being a veterinarian since I loved animals, but the thought of long years in vet school didn’t appeal to me (nor did seeing hurt or bleeding animals).
Being a stewardess (as we called them then) sounded good because of the travel, but I also loved architecture and interior designer. I won a “Best Home Design” contest in 2nd grade. I actually drew a floor plan and elevations when the other kids drew a picture of a house! I ended up getting my BA in design and interned for an interior designer after nixing the idea of architecture school. (I also took a survival skills course during college, by the way.)
What did you actually grow up to be, and how did it happen? For the past 29 years I’ve been an educator, and always in unique alternative programs. But the thought of teaching didn’t occur to me until 1993. Prior to that, I had worked my way through college in the restaurant industry and developed a passion for wine and people. After graduation, I went to work for a wine distribution company, but after a few years, I decided I hated the sales aspect and couldn’t see myself selling wine— or anything really, but especially not alcohol – for a living.
Around the same time, my friend Sheri from high school died at age 27. That shook me, since she was one of too many classmates I knew who died before our ten-year reunion. Booze, drugs, and mental health were common factors in these untimely deaths, and almost all of my friends' troubles could be traced back to high school and then to middle school.
At Sheri’s funeral, seeing her parents literally unable to stand up from grief, I realized I wanted to work with kids, in a way that might alter their trajectory away from patterns that would put their lives at risk. But I had never thought about teaching before. So, I observed in a classroom, entered a teaching program, quickly learned I had a strong philosophy, and bee-lined my way through until I was in the kind of program and grades where I could make the most difference. My classrooms have always dealt with far more than academics; the social-emotional aspect is embedded into everything.
For the past 12 years I’ve run One Spark Academy, my own alternative education program for middle schoolers. It’s exactly where I need to be and I’m inspired daily by the depth of the human experience my team and I have created. Doing something for the greater good has given me happiness beyond what material possessions could ever provide. Which is a good thing, since I don’t make much money.
Did you have role models (in real life, pop culture, movies, comic books, whatever) for the job you wanted to do? Were there people who tried to help you prepare for your dream job? Were there people who discouraged you?
I’m inspired by activists who speak up for the marginalized, and women who buck stereotypes and challenge the status quo. I would rather see someone like Malala Yousafzai, Delores Huerta, or Hillary Clinton speak than any pop star (although I do love live music!). Honestly, nothing could have prepared me for my dream job, since I didn’t realize what it was until I was suddenly driven to do it.
Teaching is hard. And, when I left the security of my public school to first start a K-8 charter school and then One Spark Academy, I was told repeatedly I was making a big mistake, that I was putting relationships and my career in jeopardy. And that did happen. But the pay off of helping—saving, in some cases—kids is beyond what I ever experienced in public education. I’m in awe of public school educators, and I believe in public education, but for me, and for what I wanted to do and the way I wanted to navigate my own life, it wasn’t working. I wanted to reach kids on a whole different level and be super creative about it, and I am absolutely doing that.
Did your mom have a job outside the home? If so, was that unusual in your world, or was it common for women to work? What kind of messages did you get from your mom--and/or your dad--about her job?
Both my parents worked, mostly in education. Once I started school, my mom was working as a secretary and my dad was a counselor, educator, and part time actor. I got my first job at 15, working retail. It was never in my mind to not work, and I never imagined just marrying some rich guy. I wanted to have my own job and my own money. I was the youngest of four kids, and most of the women I came into contact with were working women, although not all of them had “careers" per se. This was the 1970’s. The “women’s work” thing (certain jobs just for women, but careers/money for men) was still strong.
What does your today self want to be when you grow up?
I think I’m doing it! If I can figure out how to make more money and secure my retirement, that will help. But I don’t even think of retiring. I just want to keep doing what I’m doing as long as I can.